Pembantu Rumah Gua Cabut!!!!??

Pembantu rumah ni dah bekerja dengan aku selama 8 tahun... Selama tu dah banyak tempat yang mana aku gi dia pun gi sama.A'farmosa, Genting, Desaru, Redang... Me and my wife tak pernah berkira sama dia, and somemore after knowing she has a husband, we allow her to go on leave everyweek, friday night to Monday morning.

Bulan 11 hari tu, before bulan puasa dia balik indon for cuti, 6 weeks. Memang almost every year dia balik pun. Supposed to come back on the 20th of December. Pagi tu dia call cakap tak yah jemput kat KLIA, pasal husband dia jemput. Aku cam budak bangang cakap, OK. Ye lah dah 8 tahun kerja, aku percaya jugak ngan pembantu rumah ni. Tunggu punyer tunggu, sampai ke petang , dia tak timbul. Wife aku dah geram, "ewah, kita kasi chance, dia ambik advantange plak!", aku cakap, "biorle, dia nak jumpa husband dia, dah lama tak jumpa, kena le buat benda-benda yang husband and wife buat, kah,kah.."

Sampai besok pagi, dia tak muncul, anak aku gi sunat plak, aisay, ni yang leceh ni, sapa nak jaga budak yang bersunat ni kat rumah. Wife aku ambik EL. Aku gi SMS kat laki pembantu rumah aku, bertanya pasal wife dia dah balik ke tidak? kalo tak call or muncul within 24 hours, aku kena report polisi and imigresen.

Malam tu, aku dapat SMS dari laki pembantu rumah, citer wife dia tak bole kerja ngan aku lagi pasal dah pindah jauh ke Subang Jaya. Ah Sudah, ni sudah masaalah ni. Bini aku dah mula nak ngamuk, pasal pembantu runmah ni banyak pinjam duit dari dia. Ticket nak balik cuti tu pun bini aku advance kan. Bini aku sms kat laki si pembantu rumah, meluahkan perasaan geramnyer dengan style dia berenti kerja. Aku malas nak pikir history, aku nak solve the problem je. Besoknyer aku report polis, pas tu gi imigresen to cancel her permit, kena lak RM250. Cheh, banyak tu, bole main golf at least 10 kali kat PTGC.

Gi call agent yang kenal ngan budak aku, dia kata bole dapat dalam masa 3 minggu, aku cakap aku book sorang, Bayar lagi, duit advance RM 1,500.00. Aisay, nampak gayanyer pokai le gua bulan-bulan 12 and 1 ni. Apa nak buat....

Moral of the story? Kalau ada problem, lu musti ada duit untuk settle that problem, cuba pikir kalu aku tak berduit nak cari ganti, bayar report polis and imigresen,etc. Lagi le poning kepalo den , Ptuiiii!!!!

ARGHHH?!!! Bola aku masuk air le!!!! Mr ASH punyer reaction bila bola golf dia masuk air... Memember simpati gak, tapi ada harapan le income masuk buku tiga lima lagi 

Citer yang jadi sejarah buat aku -18sx-Final

Dah puas naik turun pejabat kementerian Sarawak, Dato Y sound gua, " I don't usually work with a macai of a company, I ONLY WORK WITH THE BOSS, but your mentor said, talking to you is as good as doing business with him", kah,kah,kah , aku dah nak ketawa, tapi aku pendamkan ajer perasaan tu, " Ohhh? Is that what he said to you?" "Yup, I would just like to remind you, that my remaining fee is due, so pls wire it into my bank the moment you get back to the office" Cheh, dasar lobbyist mangkuk ayun, ingat gua baru sehari dua buat ini bizness ke? Tapi aku cool lagi, Aku cakap, "I don't really know the details of your arrangement with my mentor, so, i can't say anything, but I will remind him of what you've said to me" Muka Dato Y dah berubah "Hey, he said that he will actually get your opinion before he release the money", La Dato, takkan cam tu kot, baru tadi ko panggil aku macai. " Camni le Dato, usually what I'll do with somebody who's assisting us to get project is based on success, kalu okay, You will be paid, kalu takda, susah le sikit" "Your PO will be sent to you end of next week, it's already on top of the minister's table". Kening aku dah terangkat, " Ohh? If it's true, that's good, I believe you don't have to worry about a thing then.."

"Tell your mentor if I don't receive the monay, I can also cancel the order"...

Pas tu dia hantar aku and L ke airport, with both of his so called men. L dah melonjak kata kita akan dapat order next week. Aku called my AJ to check on the validity of the Dato's words " Besok, Lu call secretary menteri ni, tanya pasal itu PO, comprande?"

Aku call mentor aku, cakap kat dia, apa-apa pun lu jangan release anything until aku dapat confirmation. Mentor aku cakap, "La, lu ingat gua sape? Nope, no monay has been released to the Dato"... Bila aku dengar cam tu, aku rasa memang dah ader le Dato ni dapat duit from my mentor.

Besok nyer, AJ call aku, kata " Hello Bro, the menteri's office kata dia tak pernah dengar pasal project ni, and no PO is supposed to be sent to us next week"... Dah agak dah. Memang buang masa aku, tapi on the bright side, dapat gak jumpa Dato yang cam dot,dot,dot ni. Ada masa aku cakap ngan dia pasal golf, dia kata dia varsity golf player kat US, tah tah yang ni pun dia kelentong aku jugak. Aku dapat chance, nak gak aku main golf ngan Dato ni, tapi musti kat KL le... Kalau dia ajak main kat Serawak, gua cakap " Lu gi main sorang sorang le Dato!!!!!!"

Citer yg jadi sejarah buat aku-18SX-3

So, cam na ni Datuk? Tanya aku. OK, WHY DON'T YOU JUST TAKE A TAXI AND GO TO CROWN PLAZA, MY BOYS ARE ALREADY THERE! Ceh, A-hole-yer Dato. Aku call my mentor, kutuk dia pasal Dato ni. Aku citer, aku kenal ramai gak Dato, tapi tak de le kerek macam ni. Dia gelakkan aku. OK.

Aku pun gi panggil L, cakap kita kena naik taxi gi Crown Plaza. Mentara tu aku SMS Dato S, orang besar salah satu persatuan politik pemuda, tanyer dia kenal ke mat ni.Datok S jawab, tak. Arghh, sudah. Sampai kat Crown Plaza kena tunggu setengah jam lagi. Jumpa bebudak Dato ni, Rashidi (decent) and sorang lagi, aku dah lupa nama.

Aku naik keter , aku salam Dato ni. Drive keter Honda CRV ajer. Drive sendiri ajer. Masa kat phone , aku expect sure pakai Brabus. Aku duduk belakang. Memula dia tak cakap apa-apa ngan aku. Lepas tu dia tanya aku something, tengok muka aku from rear view mirror. Aku tanya "Excuse me Dato, apa dia" Dia pun terus cakap cam siot " You really don't know who you're talking to, huh? I am the kingmaker of Sarawak, I can always ask to go back! You are now in Sarawak , you know, In Sarawak, to get a project, we use point system, I point , you get", OK, ok, no prob, aku dah mula baca apa- apa ayat yang bole mencairkan dato ni. " You have the guts to tell your mentor, that you've waited for me for 2 hours?!!, Did you give me your flight schedule? You're supposed to SMS me, not leave Voice Mail, I don't listen to Voice Mail!!!" Aku tekucil sebentar. Cilakak bebudak office aku tu, mana aku tau ni sumer. Takda orang citer kat aku. Aku cakap sorry lagi, aku tak tau. Mentara jalan tu, dia tunjuk umah cam Istana satu-satu "That's my uncle house. That's CM house. That's my house" Who cares, dalam hati aje le. Muka aku control senyum.... Last-last sampai kat office Sarawak government at Petrajaya. Keluar ajer dari keter, dia tanya aku, "Mana you punyer Jacket? You malayu kan? Nak jumpa menteri tapi tak pakai jacket! Dia tu Cina, memang kurang ajar punya bangsa, "refering to L, yang sentiasa pakai macam cilaka, hari tu dia pakai, T-shirt collar, with seluar tah apa-apa plus sport jacket buruk dia. Anyway, sekali lagi aku mintak maaf, nasib baik aku pakai smart gak. Manale aku tau kena jumpa menteri..

Sampai kat lift, bebudak Dato ni aku tengok cam hamba abdi plak. Lift kena tekan kan, kena make sure Dato keluar lift dulu. Lagi bertambah nyampah aku kat Dato ni. Tapi aku tengok kat keter dia ada sticker Damai golf. Kejap lagi aku citer pasai golf cair le si Dato tua kutuk ni. Aku pun puji office kementerian Sarawak. Dato pun naik syok kot. Pas tu aku citer pasal golf. Lagi plak dia layan aku. Tetiba dah jadi member lak. So, aku pun banyak le membebel ngan Dato Y yang lorat ni. Pegi le ke office Abang J, minister of Tourism Sarawak. Mat tu sick leave plak. "Golfer Melayu, meh sini, give this lady your card and they will contact you later", tetiba , L dengan cepatnya pergi hulur card dia. Dato Y jeling aku semacam. Alamak, dia tak nak any cina to be seen there. Origal plan was to leave L at the Crown Plaza. Tapi pasai aku pandai main kata-kata , si Dato ni termakan gak cakap aku.

Citer yang jadi sejarah buat aku -18 SX - 2

Aku tido pukul 1.00am malam tu, bangun kul 3.00 pagi, pergi airport, pukul 3.40am, sampai 4.45am, check in, and then kena jalan jauh, hujung airport nak sampai ke gate A11. Aku fikir, sure L tak sampai lagi and will miss the flight. Lantak le. Sesampai aku kat gate, aku nampak dia dah duduk kat situ. Hooiyooo, caya sama lu le.

Naik kapalterbang, sampai kat Kucing pukul 7:15am. Aku expect ader le orang ngan sign tulis "Golfer Melayu, Mr L", Tengok satu hapah pun tadak. Citer kat L, "lu tengok-tengok le, sebab lu tau camamana muka Dato Y ni". Dah sure tak da, aku call Hand Phone Dato Y, masuk Voice Mail, aku tinggal pesan kata aku dah sampai and kat airport Kucing sekarang ni. After 20 minutes, aku send SMS to my Mentor, cakap kita dah kena kencing, Dato tu tak nampak muka pun. mentor aku jawab, give him another hour, tak dak jugak, belah KL. Masa tu aku dah sibuk SMS member aku si HH, tanya pasal memember dia kat Kucing. Sms ASH, cammana Tiger at World Golf Championship. 2 down @ 12th holes. Alamak ni yang tak sedap ni!!!!.

Pukul 8.50am , Dato Y call aku, tanya aku kat mana. "Kat airport". "Kat Airport lagi???" Dato Y tanya aku. Dalam hati aku, "So what do you expect me to do, aku tak kenal kau, and aku tak tahu mana nak pergi". "Who are u with?". "With L". Pas tu Dato tu sembur aku "Hey, I specifically told you guys not to bring any cha,ya,nun, alip", Do you know, who you're talking to? You don't know, right. I"m like a king here in Sarawak. I don't like company kurang ajar ni. I can be very nasty when I'm angry!!!"

Alamak??!! ni apa ke hal ni. Aku kat Kucing, bukan kat KL. Hati dah mula rasa tak sedap. " My apology Datok, I don't know about that", "I was only informed about this, 2 days ago, I brought my notebook, for company's presentation and the forwarded proposal". "Siapa suruh bawak tu, I've have specifically told u guys to come up with a working proposal and burn it on a CD!!!!".....